Changing the Covers..
What do game companies constantly do to subtly say that the consumers in America like bland, boring covers?  These companies switch the good Japanese version with the dumbed-down American version.  For example, Suikoden is the best example.  However, the game I just purchased, Dual Hearts, does this also.   Take a look. #1  #2

from: PS2 Covers

Crazy Cap Look-a-Like!

This nutso captain america is out to rule the world.  Sort of like real life.  It is your job to stop him and countless other baddies.

within the same game you fight baddies from all over the world, including topless pyramid women!  This alone gives the game replay value.

A new SCMA Model

Old Couple Makes a Commitment...

Dangers of Online Dating...

How Many Danged Mother-Ships are there?

It was my first day on the job as a pilot in the Unified Air Force.  My first mission was to stop the advancing horde of alien spacecraft from invading the earth.  After taking off I was excited to be shooting down these alien scum, but there are so many of them.  Soon I was approaching the section which I was told is where the ships are advancing from.  I was ecstatic.  I was getting a rush of adrenaline.  I knew the end would be near, because this is where the Mother-Ship had to be.  It just had to be.  I approach with caution, but soon begin to blast away with everything I have, bombs and lasers.  After a long tenuous battle the mother-ship succumbed to my mighty skill.  I thought, I will be going home now and sleep in my own bed for a change, fearing no alien invasion.  But just as this thought was creeping through my head I heard a voice come from over the comlink, "there is another mother-ship, approach and destroy. over."  I was devastated but able to put a positive spin on the situation.  Okay one more ship and then this madness will be over.  Well let me tell you one thing, I have been battling mother-ships since 1981 and there has been no end in sight.  I have forgotten what land feels like.  I am starting to realize that expelling this invasion is a hopeless cause and that I should just give up so I can return home.  Maybe the aliens won't be too bad to us. 
-Zell, 'Xevious Pilot in the Unified Air Force'

======kids drawing entry

========+++++++Jan 31=======Treasure! I found a box of Gold!!!

What I did over my vacation, by, Xenodin

Over the past week I was fortunate enough to take a vacation with some pirate-folk.  This was a real fun time.  There were lots of interesting people, the food was unique, and the boat smelled funny.  For instance, ol' one eye Pete was there and Parrot-Beak-Bob, and even Poopy Pants Phil!  The food we ate was like what I have never had before.  I ate lots of fish and beans.  One night we even had rice!  Wow what an exotic vacation!  After a bit of this diet some of the crew began to get sick and die, I heard a rumor that it was scurvy.  Although I don't believe it.  Near the end of the week the pirates took the passengers to an island to dig for gold.  This was a great surprise because it wasn't in the brochure.  After a few days and nights of digging an old guy by the name of Jeff Rovin grasped at  his heart and keeled over.  This was such a wonderful show!  The pirates even pretended to bury him.  I really have to say Jeff is a true thespian.  Eventually we found the treasure box that the pirates were looking for.  Inside were oodles and oodles of gold coins.  The pirates were so happy!  They even gave me two coins to take back.  I then promptly traded them for an 8' slim jim and a Surge.  That is what I did over my vacation, I have the dysentery to prove it.

======+++++++======Valentine Cards!

Here I am with a special update to the site just in time for Valentine's Day.  Due to the tremendous response of my past Martin Kove valentine I decided to get a few more together and offer them to you.  So this Valentine's day say you really care by giving her (or him--not that there's anything wrong with that) a Kove-Kard-o-Love!

Donkey Kong, a Bad Influence===============jan 24

Who is more child-friendly than everyone's favorite gorilla, Donkey Kong?   This affable ape does kooky things to entertain is fans.  Let's see, he goes on conquests wearing a tie and only a tie.  Donkey takes along his 'friend' Diddy, who doesn't wear pants.  These are terrible suggestions to be giving to our impressionable children.  For example, just the other day I saw a person eating a banana, a BANANA!  This can only be attributed to that ape.  Later I saw people wearing ties, but no pants.  I am also pretty sure that Richard Dreyfuss was hosting that convention.  Donkey Kong has been infecting the minds of our youth for too long.  This did not just become a problem with his resurgence on the snes and n64, but in his arcade game, Donkey Kong.  In this game he subtly asks the question to the children playing, "how high can you get?"  This encouraged numerous kids to seek out their local dealer and proceed on a quest to become higher than DK.  I have no idea how many children this ruined the bright futures of, but I do know that DK is responsible for our current boatload of junkies.  Donkey Kong has no place in our society and should be forgotten.  This episode of high-apes-with-no-clothes has gone on long enough.  It is time for the public to embrace good role-models, like plumbers.  So I hope you agree with me when I say everyone take your Donkey Kong merchandise and bring it to the church and we will hold a massive bonfire.  After that we will begin our boycott, and finally we all go home and eat some mushrooms.
-Mario

++++==========jan 22

Jumping out of bed is not the first option that runs through my head during the cold days and nights of present.  The worst part is that if I leave my heater on, my room gets hot and dry, although, if I leave it off the room gets all cold and drafty.  Alas, the awful situations I have to deal with....yeah.  One big vacation.

Here in commemoration of winter is a wallpaper to adorn your desktop.

Here is the new promotional poster for SCMA.  I wonder what their target demographic is? hmmm

=======================
Now a letter from a fan of the shuttlecock:

Dear @@@@,
I was interested in participating at the upcoming Spring Shuttlecock tournament.  Could you please send me the required information packet for me to fill out.  I attached a photo of myself playing badminton so that you would realize I am an actual fan and not some fly-by-night player.  Also, I have been having trouble getting past the last part of Nobunga's Ambition.  Will you give me a tip?  In addition, I have been a heavy drinker for most of my life and just recently gave it up, but I feel like drinking when I wake up at night and look at myself in the mirror.  Can you give me any advice in dealing with this problem?  It burns when I pee, what does that mean?  I really miss my Surge.  Do you have any info on where to buy some?
[editor--this goes on for 5 more pages]
Your faithful Mouseketeer,
Marvelous Junior in a Mask
===
Don't ask me why he sent the email here.  I have no affiliation with the SCMA or the AA or Derek Whipple.  I have the restraining order to prove it.  Although, I will try my best to answer your questions.
1)My tip is for you to throw yourself out of the window.  No not that one.  The one at the very top of the building.
2)My advice is to give in and drink.  Drinking is all you have now that your wife is in someone else's bed.
3)you have herpes
4)no I don't but you can make a cheap imitation yourself.  You take an empty bottle and unzip ****************************** when it's full---drink---enjoy!
...and for his picture.  I couldn't get it to open, but I am betting he looks something like this:

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Why not look at, Star Wars Pepsi:  A Final Journey With Watto

"To all this grand old scheme of things
To all the pain it brings
To all those who pull the strings
I bid good riddance"